Maggots!

*Warning: graphic medical story about to commence.*

So while I'm here enjoying-myself-slash-studying at the shore, others in my class have actually started their fourth year of medical school by doing actual work. My friend David, for instance, just finished a month of neurology and yesterday began a month of urology, his chosen field. One of his first patients was an older, homeless, alcoholic man that urology was asked to consult on.

From what they can tell, the guy isn't a very good historian, and now he's doped up on meds to keep him sedated, but apparently he was out on his boat (I guess he lives on a boat on the Ohio?) and mentioned that he was having trouble seeing. A friend convinced him he needed to see a doctor, so he docked his boat and started walking to the hospital. At some point, he collapsed or fell or something, so EMS was called and that's how he actually ended up in the ER, as a trauma patient.

Well, I don't know what exactly happened when, but at some point they took off his clothes, and noticed that the flesh of his crotch was nasty looking, black, necrotic, etc. An old infection, perhaps? But then -- and don't say I didn't warn you or that you didn't read the title of this post -- MAGGOTS come crawling out! And on further inspection, they were coming out of his perineum as well. And his umbilicus.

And THEN, ENT comes to examine the guy, and they discover maggots in his ears, and coming out of his EYES.

Oh. My. God.

On his head CT, you can apparently see the tracks the maggots have made burrowing around his head. They think the maggots have eaten through some of his extraocular muscles, which is why he can't move his eye properly and is having vision problems.

Ophthamology did an exam on him and videotaped it, and David got to see it. He said it looks fairly -- well, not like a normal eye exam, but nothing that impressive -- and then all of a sudden, maggots come crawling out!

Trauma apparently had the idea to give the guy a bath and try to wash the maggots away. Great idea, except they all (the maggots) freaked out at the touch of water and burrowed back into the patient, not coming back out until the bath water was gone.

The smell is apparently horrendous. I can imagine -- I once saw maggots on a person, but it was a dead person (an old guy who had died alone at home of natural causes in the summertime in Philadelphia, without air conditioning, and he had started to decompose by the time he was discovered and brought in for autopsy; I saw him in the autopsy suite, and it was the most horrifying thing I've ever seen in my life -- maggots crawling out of his nose and everything, and the smell was absolutely nauseating). This guy is -- at least for now -- STILL ALIVE. An entomologist of some sort has been called in to give his opinion. I mean, this guy is essentially rotting from the inside out! Urology doesn't really know what, if anything, they're going to do -- the maggots in his privates are probably less of a concern than the ones in his head, at this point.

And today, David sends me this text message: "That guy with the maggots...they are turning into flies."

I told him he needs to get a copy of all the xrays, CTs, videos, everything on this guy. Take a picture for his own records. De-identify it all, and save it. Because no one is ever going to believe this story, and he's going to need the pictures to prove it.

I am so jealous.

Hey, I start urologic gynecology next Monday; think I'll get to see anything similar?

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OK, so side note: I don't really know what is going on with this guy from a medical standpoint, but I would love to know. How do you grow maggots in you without your body putting up some sort of defense (his white count is reportedly normal)? AIDS? Some other weird sort of immunodeficiency? How long has he been infested? Someone had better write up a case report, because that shit needs to be published!

Clean that sh*t up

Don't be stupid, people. You're trying to get a job this year.

Med students oversharing on Facebook

Who said girls can't do math?

Here's a big F*** You to the priest who told me in eighth grade that girls can't do math.

Study: Girls equal to boys in math skills

That's right.

And yes, despite my continued (and embarrassing) inability to oftentimes perform simple arithmetic in my head -- or at times, even on paper -- I did just fine in calculus, and placed out of college math with my AP scores. Could I have gone farther? Sure. Would I have? Hell no -- but that's out of my own laziness and interest, and nothing more.

My biggest beef with the article? The last two sentences:

"Back in 1992, Barbie stopped saying math was hard after Mattel received complaints from, among others, the American Association of University Women.

So far, while her current career choices include baby doctor and veterinarian -- and Dallas Cowboys cheerleader, too -- Barbie has not branched out into technology or engineering."

Yeah, last time I checked, a "baby doctor" is a pediatrician, and both "baby doctors" and veterinarians took advanced math classes to get where they are today. Math isn't limited to technology and engineering.

Shared Items

I've added a feed of my shared items from Google Reader over on the sidebar. You can see the last 10 items I've shared, or click "Read More" at the bottom of the feed to be taken directly to my Google Reader shared page. Seriously, I can't recommend this RSS reader enough. I love it. Not only do I get to share things that I find interesting, but I get to see what my Google friends are reading and finding interesting, as well.

Studying

I suck at it, basically. I'm pretty sure I've mentioned this before, over and over, in fact, but I'm a terrible studier. My No. 1 problem is food -- I get hungry when I study, so I need to study somewhere that I can eat.

I take my test NEXT FRIDAY, AUGUST 1, which is drawing very, very near. I don't really have time to be dealing with this studying inefficiency crap anymore.

So, new plan:

• Study at home in the mornings (and acknowledge that "studying" in the morning can mean nothing more than catching up with Google Reader and email).
• Eat lunch at home (or out, or wherever). This is key, because I get very annoyed at being somewhere like a library, all spread out and comfortable, and then having to pack everything up just to go find lunch at some place like Taco Bell, which will take all of 15 minutes, and then I come back to the library and someone has stolen my spot. AAAARGH.
• After lunch, head over to the Pleasantville public library. Study (for real) for a good 5-6 hours. Hopefully be very productive so I stop feeling all down on myself for not studying, which really doesn't help motivate me to study. The library is nice enough, with free wifi that works (the Brigantine branch's wifi was being spotty and they couldn't help me figure it out, so it sucks I have to drive off the island, but whatever), and I have successfully had sodas and snacks there without attracting too much attention.
• Go home whenever Eric gets done with work, and have a relaxing evening. I might have to ditch the relaxing evenings and add more study time this week, but it's so nice to take evening strolls on the beach and play cards, like this is actually a beach vacation!
  

The biggest problem with studying? My question bank program is online, which means I *need* my computer to study, which means I *need* to have internet access to do it, which therefore means I am way too tempted to waste more time on the internet instead of doing questions. Of course, even without the internet, I have managed to waste whole hours at Spider solitaire and Minesweeper.

I'm almost tempted to call it a lost cause.

Except I need to get into residency, dammit!

Drying your hands

A couple years ago, I thought the motion-sensor towel dispensers were awesome. I'm one of those people that doesn't like to touch too many things in a public bathroom, although I strongly dislike automatic faucets (because they don't work well and the water's always cold), and I don't go so far as to turn off manual faucets or open doors with a layer of paper towel or my elbow as protection.

Even better? The new electric hand dryers.

Back in January, I visited Eric in Brigantine and on a session of errand-running, we stopped in the Target in Hamilton Township to use the restroom. Upon exiting, I asked him if he had used the hand dryer. "You mean the one powered by Boeing?" he countered. I thought that was immensely funny. Now that that's my Target, at least through September, I think of him every time I go in that bathroom (your call on whether that's a good association or not).

It was the XLerator hand dryer, and it was crazy. It blew so hard that it moved the skin on the back of your hands all over the place -- disconcerting to see how much give my skin has at this young age -- and dried them in seconds.

Even cooler? The Dyson Airblade, which I got to try in the Brussels airport. It was a weird sensation -- not really having air blown on your hands, but not quite like having water sucked off your hands, either. Also dried your hands in seconds.

In my mind, the bare minimum for all public restrooms is now the motion-sensored towel dispenser. Extra points go to those using the new hand dryers. This is all for coolness and convenience points, of course. However, the Green Lantern even says they're more eco-friendly.

So behind

So I'm spending a month at the shore to study for Step 2 and get my life in order, etc., and I feel completely behind. First of all, I haven't had what I would consider to be a "normal" day yet -- between traveling back to Maryland to help my mom get packed for Brussels, to traveling to suburban Philly for family events, and wanting to actually spend time at the beach, rather than studying. Then there's the moving-in issue: I arrived at Eric's tiny apartment with tons of clothes and shoes (hey, I'm here for 2.5 months and I have to be ready for anything from beach to normal clothes to scrubs to work dress-up), and I have not yet succeeded in putting them -- or the 6 huge bags of clean laundry we produced yesterday -- away.

I don't have a good place to study. Ideally, something like a coffee shop or Panera Bread with wireless internet would be good; I like the combination of food and internet. So finding a place to study is on my to-do list for the week, as is researching question banks.

Just as I was starting to feel slightly in control -- got the dirty laundry done yesterday, have plans to put clothes away and check out the public library's wireless today -- it hit me that I need to start applying for residency now, too. I got an email today with my ERAS ID and a list of things I'm supposed to be doing right now, like writing my personal statement. Writing my personal statement?!?!!?!? Crap. Not to mention that I'm already overdue on updating my CV to send to potential recommendation letter writers, and coming up with a list of 50 programs I'm interested in applying to, to send to a mentor of mine. Entering panic mode.

Luckily (unluckily?), when I enter panic mode, it often triggers me to be productive in non-essential things, like cleaning, so maybe that's a good thing for the apartment. Unfortunately, it also triggers me to pretend like I have nothing that needs to be done, and that's doubly dangerous when there's a beach one block away...

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In other news, a 10.6% cut in Medicare payments is scheduled to go into effect immediately, which doesn't help the cause of universal healthcare (the ideal proposal, at this point, is to simply expand Medicare to cover everyone). Hard to get doctors to buy into it when they are about to see a cut in their payment rates. Time to call your senators, everyone.

Also, I saw an article on the 66 cities in which it's a decent deal to buy a home, and the Philly area is on it -- yay! So is Louisville, but that ship sailed for us a couple years ago. There's also a list of 34 cities where buying a house is a bad idea, if you're interested.