Bahm Buhm.

We just lived the opening scene of a Law and Order episode. Almost.

We went out to dinner downtown, and on the way back, cut through the building's parking garage to get to our building's front door. We were walking along, commenting on the nasty moldy smell in the garage, and Eric pointed out a newly repainted parking spot -- and then we saw it. A large, white lump. At first glance, maybe a garbage bag full of trash. And then it registered: it was shaped like a body, completely wrapped in a white blanket. We scurried out of there and went inside to discuss our options.

1. Was it a body? If it wasn't, then we didn't need to do anything. But I really thought it was a body.
2. Do we call 911? If we thought it was a body, then we had to call. Hopefully it was just a homeless guy sleeping, but the WHOLE body was wrapped up, even the head.

So I called 911. The operator asked me all sorts of questions -- male or female? conscious or unconscious? All I could tell her was that there was a lump shaped like a body wrapped in a white blanket lying on the floor of the parking garage. But when she asked if the person was conscious or not, I was overcome with a wave of professional guilt. I'm certainly trained to evaluate bodies and provide resuscitation efforts, if necessary. And if it had been a guy we saw get hit by a car, or a non-blanket-covered person lying prostrate on the ground, I like to think my training would have kicked in over my being scared shitless and I would have done something myself. But I'm not trained to pull blankets off of potential bodies that may or may not be unconscious and may or may not have guns. So I ultimately felt OK with my decision.

Anyway, the 911 operator sent a cop, and we waited for him downstairs. And followed him into the garage, where he approached the blanket-wrapped lump with equal caution. Gave it the once-over with his flashlight. And then reached down all of a sudden and pulled back the blanket. To reveal a man lying very, very still. He waved his flashlight around in the guy's face. The guy was STILL NOT MOVING. And then cop said very loudly, "Get up. You can't sleep here." And the guy picked his head up. And I took a huge breath and hightailed it out of the garage.

YIKES!

I talked to the cop once he was done with the homeless guy, more to explain myself than anything else. He said the guy was well known to the downtown cops, and was often drunk, covered in his own soil, and found begging for money near the bars. He himself had thrown the guy in jail just a few months ago. He thanked me for calling it in and I thanked him for responding, and came back inside.

It could have been the opening scene of a Law and Order episode. But I'm really glad it wasn't.